Listening

October 9, 2008
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How are your listening skills? Until last week, I would have told you that mine are excellent – but then I got caught not listening to someone during an important conversation – opps.

Why wasn’t I listening? I have been giving that some thought. I dug out the Listening Style’s Profile (Watson, Barker, and Weaver*), and took the test.

It turns out that I am an Action-Oriented Listener. I get impatient with speakers who jump all over the place. But that’s not good enough in my profession. I need to be able to hear what a speaker is saying, regardless of how he or she is saying it. So, I have some work to do. Want to take the test? Answer the following questions honestly using the scale of:

0 = Never, 1 = Infrequently, 2 = Sometimes, 3 = Frequently, 4 = Always

  1. I focus my attention on the other person’s feelings when I am listening to them
  2. When listening to others I quickly notice if they are pleased or disappointed
  3. I become involved when listening to the problems of others
  4. I nod my head and/or use eye contact to show interest in what others are saying
  5. I am frustrated when others don’t present their ideas in an orderly, efficient way
  6. When listening to others, I focus on inconstancies and/or errors in what is being said
  7. I jump ahead and/or finish thoughts of speakers
  8. I am impatient with people who ramble on during conversations
  9. I prefer to listen to technical information
  10. I prefer to hear facts so I can personally evaluate them
  11. I like the challenge of listening to complex information
  12. I ask questions to probe for additional information
  13. When hurried, I let the other person(s) know that I have a limited amount of time to listen
  14. I begin a discussion by telling others how long I have to meet
  15. I interrupt others when I feel time pressure
  16. I look at my watch or clocks in the room when I have limited time to listen to others

What type of listener are you? To find out, add up the scores for each block of 4 questions.

People-Oriented (highest score is questions 1-4): Concern for others’ feelings and emotions is paramount. Looks for common areas of interest and tries to respond empathetically. Possible downside: spending time trying to win over the listener, rather than actually listening.

Action-Oriented (highest score is questions 5-8): Preference for concise, error-free information. Can be particularly impatient and easily frustrated when listening to a disorganised presentation. Possible downside: ‘checking out’ of a conversation where the speaker isn’t being concise.

Content-Oriented (highest score is questions 9-12): Preference for receiving complex and challenging information. Tend to evaluate facts and details carefully before forming judgments and opinions. Possible downside: ignores the speaker’s emotional message in pursuit of facts.

Time-Oriented (highest score is questions 13-16): Preference for brief or hurried interactions with others. Tend to let others know how much time they have to listen or meet. Possible downside: people around you not telling you everything because they are worried about time constraints.

Most people have either one or two main styles. What are yours? What impact might they be having on your conversations with your clients, prospects, partner or kids? If you don’t think you have the balance right, what do you need to do to make a change?

*Watson, K.W., Barker, L.L. & Weaver, J.B. The Listening Styles Profile (LSP-16): Development and validation of an instrument to assess four listening styles. The international Journal of Listening, Vol. 9. Pp. 1-14.

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